What if I made a mistake

I’m sitting in an ‘Anti-Ageing’ restaurant. Yep, you heard right – an anti ageing restaurant.

I’m surrounded by Vitamin D sprays, glutamine powder, turmeric tea and a fabulous selection of Stevia liquids. I’m also sitting with my plumber and the manager of the restaurant. The plumber tells me what Stevia is, a healthy liquid sugar substitute.

He’s a brilliant plumber.

I’m here because I’ve been racked with guilt for the last 24 hours. Yesterday I walked past the place, saw the words ANTI-AGEING EATERY and EAT YOURSELF PRETTY, and felt a certain amount of outrage. How dare they, what are they thinking, sugar will kill, come on guys, must we have the no carbs pushed at our sagging necklines all the time? On a Sunday walk?

I was so outraged that I posted a pic of the restaurant’s signage and trashed them online. And because I have fabulous friends, they joined in.

Until my boyfriend called me.

‘I don’t get it,’ he says. “Why the intensity?”

Because we’re bombarded, I say. All the time. Smooth out your wrinkles, perfect your brows, spend 3 billion dollars on this latest cream, spoon a little collagen into your carrot cake, fuck off I do not want to eat myself to prettiness thank you.

“Okay, sure, it’s sexist and ageist and be outraged,” he says. “But hey, it’s not too unlike the Longevity magazines you left at my place, the moisturiser, the perfume, the waxing, and all other manner of elixirs.”

I thought about what I had done. I needed to take a hard look at myself. While I’m still glad I was outraged, I shouldn’t have trashed them online. Why harm – or even kill – a business with the flick of a Facebook post, in this time of acute economic decline and unemployment, or at any other time?

I should’ve been more circumspect and careful before going on record. It’s a new business. There is an owner, Abdulla Miya, and there is a divine head chef, Andre Brown, who I could’ve spoken to, and to whom I’m talking to right now. And to the staff, who are good and pleasant.

I know that because they are serving me my pancakes.

With grace.

It’s a Monday morning. Besides my plumber, who is a regular, there are women of all ages here. Lots of them. Some are smooth, some are wrinkled, one is a little round, HAHA WATCH THOSE CARBS DARLING, not all are outraged by the name. And I have to admit the place is lovely. So are the smoothies. They’re playing a light jazz. And even the coffee is good.

I eat the raspberry coulis pancakes while I chat to Andre. He knows his food. He also gets what I’m saying about their messaging. He’s going to talk to the owner. Maybe they’ll change it, maybe they won’t.  It’s okay. I’m glad I spoke to him. I’m glad I didn’t just do the social media armchair thing. 

I shouldn’t have done it in the first place.

I’m sorry.

Will these pancakes erase my wrinkles? Probably not. Are they very good. YES. Are the shelves lined with all fabulous health products and teas (peach and rose and orange and vanilla) and is there honey to die for?


Do I suggest you come here and try this place.

I do.

Meet me for breakfast.

We’ll get beautiful together. From the inside out.


Clenergy Restaurant, 51  Greenfield Road, Greenside. Tel 0846262812  www.clenergy.com




8 thoughts on “What if I made a mistake

  1. Okay, I still think the name and the advertising are ridiculous but now I’m also feeling bad for piling on. Well done to you for going there and writing this. I will go check it out soon!


  2. Respect! I’ve seen you use the word before and now return it with my compliments. I agreed with your post the first time round and the second, if that makes sense. Still think the name sucks though, and what it does to me and my crowd of complexes, but I like pancakes and smoothies and the chance to tell people what I think, so I’ll give the place a go.


  3. Respect! I’ve seen you use the word and so return the compliment now. I agreed with your first and second posts, if that makes sense, but still think the name and concept stink and resent the way it wakes up my crowd of complexes. Anyway, all that aside, I like pancakes and telling people what I think, so I’ll give it a go and thanks for the heads up.


  4. Lisa here. Loved reading this. I totally can relate and am so impressed by your solution, with credit to the instigator too!


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