Last night I was invited to a food tasting and did a terrible job at hiding my Food Imposter Syndrome. I love eating food but I don’t know much about describing it.
Plus I cannot tell the difference between cumin and coriander, I find amuse-bouche ridiculous and always pronounce confit the wrong way.
Pass the CONFIT please.
Oh, a silent T, really?
Our first course was a fish dish.
Me: Ooooh yum this Kingklip is very very good hey.
Foodie: Best eat the Snoek with your hands, Vee. That way you can feel for bones.
Because I was trying not to choke on a bone, also had gone bright red because I swear I knew it was snoek, I knew, I knew….
I didn’t know you could get snoek in Johannesburg.
Ooh yum, what a treat.
I went on to use the same Ooooh yum to describe the next many dishes.
Ostrich fillet with maroela jelly. Yum delicious.
Beef fillet with roasted chakalaka. Oooooh ooh seriously delicious.
Hake in miso with ginger and maple something oh yes yes I would love another taste, thank you, ooops sorry just dropped a little miso down my cleavage.
I found the food sexy. But according to Foodie Rules, one should never describe food as sexy.
So you know, the food was not sexy.
But the women eating the food were very fucking sexy. And velvety. And creamy. And decadent and sinful and rich and oh yes yes give me more oh god yes yes please.
The wine was sexy. In fact, it was nothing short of adulterous. I don’t remember the different wines other than I fell in love with The Villiera Jasmine 2014, the taste, the aroma, a seriously evocative wine which made me feel sweet goddesses I don’t know, maybe horny as hell.
Lucky Bean is in Melville, my neighbourhood. I go there all the time but you should too. It’s elegant but not too elegant, sexy but not too sexy, perfect for lunch, an evening drink, dinner or just to hang out over the weekend and listen to music.
You can sit indoors or out, the service is excellent and mostly – the food is divine tasty yum melt in your mouth very sexy delicious.
Lucky Bean, 16 on 7th Street, Corner 4th Avenue, Melville.
Tel: 011 – 482 5572.