‘Violet. Do you have any idea how much money you spend on breakfast every year?’ ‘A small fortune,’ I replied, as I bit into my toast. ‘But I would probably spend more if I made breakfast at home, forgot to switch off the oven, burned … Continue reading On having a dowry
I’d waited in the queue for ages and when I got to the front the officer looked at me, looked at the paperwork, shook her head and pointed in the direction of another building. ‘Why?’ I asked. ‘Because you were not born here,’ she replied, … Continue reading That queue please, you’re foreign
‘You’re looking very smart,’ I said to my ex-husband who was looking rather dashing in a full on suit and a tie. ‘I don’t know what I am supposed to wear to a funeral,’ he said. ‘It’s been a while.’ Everyone around us was in … Continue reading Life, death and Armani
a long bath oil a white towel drip drying in the sun mangoes peaches a picnic falling sleeping at the picnic bare feet a sundress spaghetti straps and an old straw hat starting a new book never wanting to put it down eating two chocolate … Continue reading What makes a Sunday
One of the comments on my blog this week was from a woman who works as an escort in Spain. ‘I found your blog’ she wrote. ‘I work for an escort agency in Europe and would be very keen to collaborate with you. Please let … Continue reading Escorts, hookers, call girls, me
Roses are red Violets are blue I’m just not in the mood How about you?
I’m a bit obsessed with the Netflix show ‘Santa Clarita Diet’ and have been talking to a long distance friend about it. The wit, the dialogue, the brilliance of it all, the thighs, the giblets, the tastiness of dead men. So on my walk this … Continue reading Sex and cannibals