I interrupted our coffee date, stood and hugged the kid walking past.
‘Have a great holiday,’ I said. ‘See you when you’re back…’
‘Who is that?’
‘Oh, just a kid, I helped him lose his virginity a while back, no biggie.
My friend’s eyes got bigger and bigger. The kid was about eighteen.
‘Wow, lucky kid,’ he said.
‘Yeah, really,’ I agreed.
Because the more I write the more I take pleasure in telling fantastical stories that are just a bunch of lies but make for interesting tales.
I’m leaving town, got dumped by Ryan Gosling, trying to deal with my heartbreak.
Packing my snow boots, ready to climb Everest.
Solo boat trip around the world, dammit where’s my compass.
Heading to a Buddhist retreat in Uzbekistan.
Joining a nunnery.
Or maybe packing my bag, wearing a gorgeous frock, no underwear and eloping with the difficult guy.
See ya in 2017.