Ten ways we’re being fucked over.

I had no plans this weekend. I wrote bad poetry, lazed around in sunbeams and read tons of glossy magazines

I struggled. Not with the heat or the haikus, but with the content.

Cosmo. Fair Lady. Woman and Home. Even Good Bloody Housekeeping.

It’s like a time warp. Reading the same stuff that we’ve been reading for years.

Five ways to remove your body hair.

Ten ways to lose weight.

Fifteen ways to change your sex life.

Twenty ways to hold on to your man.

How to buy the perfect bra

And how to throw a wedding for just one million rand.

How about admitting that the underwire of the bra that cost more than your car is killing you?

How about how not to have a wedding?

And maybe deciding that you don’t need to hold on to your man unless it’s while you’re having sex against the wall and he’s picked you up and goddammit you do not want to fall down.

I would change everything.

I would start with the headline – 10 ways Magazines are Fucking you over.

Give us stuff we want to read. Things we can relate to. Women who look real. Bras that don’t have underwire.

Give us stuff that’s juicy and engaging and exciting and even a little bit challenging.

Maybe I’m just difficult.  Maybe I’m reading the wrong magazines.

I’m going to give in and go back to the sunshine.

Don’t tell anyone but I’m taking Cosmo with me. I need to finish their ‘Sexier by Summer’ guide.

‘How to get the perfect bikini bod.’

See ya.

20 thoughts on “Ten ways we’re being fucked over.

  1. I would gladly start that magazine with you.
    Here are some contributions:

    Your Body Is Fine:
    Most women do not squirt or just come vaginally(and other porn lies)

    Quit “Grooming” Today!
    (Men don’t do it, why should you?)

    Things We Impulse Bought At Target

    Diets Are Bullshit

    Best Places To Dine Solo


    Liked by 1 person

      1. I was listening to Howard Stern one morning as they played interview clips with porn stars -they talked about how the women don’t squirt…they douche with water or other liquid and hold it for the shot. Talk about camera tricks!

        Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s